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Posted: 2017-04-10 01:10:29

Updated April 11, 2017 10:51:12

Iconic comedy duo John Clarke and Bryan Dawe entertained audiences with their political satire for over 25 years.

As their ABC program page explains, "John pretends to be someone he isn't pretending to be and Bryan behaves with grace under pressure".

We've collated some of their most loved segments and classic exchanges in memory of the legendary John Clarke.

As sports commentator 'Hugh Jexcitement'

Clarke: "There's huge problems with the village here [in Rio]

Dawe: "What kinds of problems?"

Clarke: "Well it's supposed to be a village Bryan, but I'm sure they'll sort something out"

As energy consultant 'Wal Socket'

Dawe: "Wasn't all of the energy in this country owned by the Australian people?"

Clarke: "Yeah. We fixed that."

As Opposition Leader Bill Shorten

Dawe: "Let me just go through some concerns, if I may, being expressed by Australians."

Clarke: "Concerns expressed by who Bryan?"

Dawe: "By Australians."

Clarke: "Really? Nobody's said anything to me…"

As Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull

Clarke: "What you've done there is you've taken a statement I made in one context and you've read it back to me… the elite do this."

Dawe: "I am not elite Prime Minister."

Clarke: "— No Bryan, but I am.

Clarke: "Perhaps you should join the Labor party?"

Dawe: "Bryan, I disagree with everything the Labor party believes."

Clarke: "Yeah, would be a bit like running the Liberal party I suppose wouldn't it?"

As Malcolm, 'head boy'

Dawe: "Malcolm you are the head boy! We made you the head boy."

Clarke: "I know, but the [guys in the locker room] won't let me do what I'm supposed to do.

"That's the issue. That's why we're having another big vote."

As news director 'Howie Diddit'

Clarke: "Let me assure you that the US election is not yet over."

Dawe: "…but the election itself is over."
Clarke: "Well yes Bryan but there are complexities that we don't yet know.

"For example we don't know which ways the Kardashians voted."

As Deputy PM Barnaby Joyce

Clarke [answering a phone call from 'Bob Katter']: "G'day Bob what are you doing Saturday? Oh you're wanting to run a country. Don't you worry about him, I'll talk to him."

As former PM Tony Abbott

"We'll get those previous changes through… by changing them back to what they were beforehand."

As political economist 'Alec Tricklefault'

Dawe: "Could you please confine yourself to talking about what's just happened in Britain?

"I don't want to know about what's just happened in Australia, I already know what's just happened here."

Clarke: "What I'm saying is that this was a huge miscalculation by the Prime Minister [Turnbull]… he shouldn't have gone to the vote."

As social researcher and pollster 'Burton Ernie'

Dawe: "Faffing is quite a big electorate isn't it?"

Clarke: "Yes. Faffing is absolutely enormous. Faffing is one of the biggest electorates in the country.

"It takes in Promise, takes in Flannel, takes in Dissemble… it doesn't stop until you get to Mount Excuses."

As NBN Chief 'Wesley Broadband'

Clarke: "If you go to the website Bryan and you just type your address in it will give you the status of the rollout in precisely your area"

Dawe: "— Yes but — I know we don't have it in my area…"

Clarke: "If you go to the website Bryan and you just type your address in it will give you the status of the rollout in your area."

As IKEA's departmental head 'Allen Key'

Clarke: "I work in business administration, Bryan."

Dawe: "Wow! how exciting."

As US correspondent 'Donald-Sin Trouble'

Clarke: "It looks as if we've only got one candidate here who can actually"

Dawe: "— eliminate reason on every issue?"

Clarke: "Fulfil the actual requirements of public office."

As the 'Australian Voter'

Clarke: "Does the term climate change mean anything to you?"

Dawe: "So the party that you're voting for, what have they done about climate change?"

Clarke: "They're trying to grow the economy."

Topics: arts-and-entertainment, comedy-humour, death, community-and-society, australia

First posted April 10, 2017 11:10:29

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