When I started in newspapers they made money. It was a long time ago.

And at the paper where I began, printing was still in the Dark Ages and part of the training was to minimise the chances of errors. One such was over-inking, where a page or pages got a tad too much ink applied and dark photographs turned out as black smudges. Admittedly I haven't seen over-inking for years, but one never forgets one's training, so I asked the Sennheiser lady if she had any pictures of the Dior Homme collection that weren't so dark.

"The design team would like to keep them as they are to reflect the aesthetic of the products," she explained. So if this story is accompanied by a black smudge, well, I tried.

There is a great deal I don't understand about fashion. For example, Sennheiser now offers two ways to set up a complete, premium personal listening environment, and if you'd like one and you don't understand fashion you can take the first route, with a pair of HD800S headphones for your high-end listening at home. They're $2599.95, but you'll probably also want the matching HDVD800 digital-to-analogue converter and headphone amp to give them a bit more grunt, so add $2799.95.

Now, get a good pair of noise cancellers for travelling. PXC550s are just the thing at $629.95. And if you want something to make using your phone nicer get some IE80 earbuds, $599.95. That makes a total of $6629.80, and if you buy through Sennheiser's website you'll get free delivery. Visit a dealer and you'd be mad not to negotiate.

The second route is for all those mindful of their image and eager to make an impression on their discerning friends. Visit the Dior Homme Boutique in Sydney (or if you are, as Paul Keating suggests, camping out, there's also one in Melbourne and online) and buy the same stuff, beautifully presented and exclusively finished, for $14,000.

Because you're a person who appreciates the chic of a Dior Homme boutique, you'll also appreciate la simplicité élégante of the packs they've made up with Sennheiser. There has been a laying on of hands to offer the 'ultimate sensual journey into sound'.

You'll get 'exclusive storage furniture that conveys an unparalleled sense of occasion'. Slide open the big drawer and you'll find the HD800S headphones finished in black, anthracite and brushed metal with bold red detailing, encased in calfskin leather. The headphone amp, with its own slightly smaller drawer, is housed just as nicely and finished to match the headphones. The noise cancellers and earbuds are also of matching finish and they're in leather pouches.

So, to summarise, all of the Sennheiser stuff is technically identical to the models on offer in the normal hi-fi shops but it looks different and comes in nice packaging for an extra $7370.20.

If $14,000 will max out the card there's the travel pack, which places the $629.95 PXC550s ('creating an oasis of calm in any environment') in a 'beautifully crafted backpack of finest leather.' That's $3300.

There are a couple of other packs available, called Daily (the noise cancellers in a soft black and red leather clutch case) and Pocket (earbuds in a black and red leather storage pouch) at $1650 each.

I guess my problem is that during my formative years at Birregurra State School, number 723 chic was never much on the agenda. Maybe aesthetes will regard the Dior Homme/Sennheiser collection as the bargain of the year. I'm a bloke, I wouldn't know.