“We shall see... big families always go through drama ... It remains to be seen. Are they going to be drawn closer together or are they going to be drawn apart?”

You may have thought that the past 12 days would have given the royals the perfect opportunity to patch up their differences.

But, in reality, the extraordinary sequence of recent events has only served to highlight how detached the Sussexes now are from “the Firm”, if not the family.

Take the state reception invitation debacle. Originally, the couple received an email saying they were welcome to join the gathering of 1000 world leaders at Buckingham Palace on Sunday night.

It is understood that the couple only got wind that they might not be able to go, after all, following a press briefing on Thursday when a question mark was raised by the King’s spokesman over the attendance of “non-working” royals.

Such is the breakdown in communication between the Sussexes’ people and the palace that they couldn’t get a solid answer on whether they were in or out until Friday evening, when it emerged they had been invited “in error”.

As one insider explained in bafflement: “They have done everything as best they could. They have turned up, they have smiled, shaken hands, whatever was asked.”

That Harry was only informed of the Queen’s death five minutes before the public also speaks to a growing theme of disengagement.

There was similar imbroglio over whether or not Harry could wear his Blues and Royals uniform at any stage.

At first, the decision was taken that he should not – in line with the Duke of York, who has also stepped down from public duties. Then a reprieve was offered to Prince Andrew to wear his uniform for the children’s vigil in Westminster Hall on Friday evening.

Following a hullabaloo, the Sussexes’ spokesperson cleared the situation up in a statement. “Prince Harry, The Duke of Sussex will wear a morning suit throughout events honouring his grandmother.” It added: “His decade of military service is not determined by the uniform he wears.”

Yet behind the scenes, conversations clearly took place to ensure that Harry would be given the same allowance as his disgraced uncle and be able to wear uniform for Saturday’s vigil by the grandchildren. The palace later briefed that the King took the final decision.

When Harry received his uniform he was reportedly “left heartbroken” after his late grandmother’s initials ‘ER’ were removed.

Again misunderstanding appears to have reigned supreme since Harry has not been entitled to wear the cipher (or indeed the twisted gold rope aiguillettes) on his shoulder since February 2021 when he was stripped of all his military titles.

The Duke must surely have been aware that this was the case, despite the apparent incredulity of his largely US-based staff.

Another matter on uniform that remains unclear is why William, Prince of Wales wore only the cipher but not the aiguillettes, despite being obliged to wear both. It looked like a concession to mollify his brother but, as with a lot of what happened last week, no explanation was given.

The news that Harry was only informed of the Queen’s death five minutes before the public announcement also speaks to a growing theme of disengagement from Harry and Meghan.

Insiders have been at pains to point out that he was told as soon as he could be told: in mid-air.

Although Harry was informed of the Queen’s declining health at the same time as William that Thursday morning, his aides struggled to find a suitable scheduled flight, leaving him with no choice but to charter his own Cessna from Luton airport.

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He eventually took off at 5.35pm – an hour after Prime Minister Liz Truss was reportedly told of the Queen’s death. The release of the public statement was delayed until the King managed to reach him on board the plane shortly before he touched down.

A source later explained that Harry had not been treated differently from any other member of the family, since the King was not in regular contact with anyone during what was a very difficult day.

“The King was adamant that the official statement must not be released until all members of the family had been informed. That was a father talking because he cares.”

However, there is no doubt that the sequence of events that unfolded after the monarch’s demise shows the extent of the gulf that still exists between Harry, Meghan and the royals.

The disassociation works both ways, of course. As the couple prepare to return to what the King described as “their life overseas”, uncertainty remains over whether – or when – Harry will publish his memoirs.

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That the palace and indeed, the royals, have no idea what’s in them, speaks to a family that doesn’t look as if it will be singing from the same hymn sheet any time soon.

The Telegraph, London

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