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There was no swimmer more emotional at the Brisbane Aquatic Centre than Lani Pallister at the Australian Swimming Trials on Monday.
Tears were always close to the surface for the effervescent 22-year-old, who overcame some enormous demons to qualify for the 2024 Paris Olympic Games in the 400m freestyle alongside Ariarne Titmus.
"I can't really put it into words," Pallister said after her race.
"When I finally saw my mum, I cried a bit, when Ellie [Cole] told me I was going to become an Olympian, I cried.
"Going from three years ago when I quit swimming to now where I get to go to my first Olympics is just incredible."
The very mention of the word "Olympian" brought forth those tears again — and understandably so.
Three years ago in Adelaide, Pallister missed out on making the squad, finishing fifth in the 400m and 12th in the 200m.
The heartbreak of missing out led to the Sydney-born swimmer quitting the sport.
But the dream never died.
Pallister admitted that she dreamt about the Olympics "every day for the last three years".
But first, she needed to address another issue. One that could have done a whole lot more than hold her back in her swimming career.
Pallister said that one of the things she learned over the past three years was that "eating is really important."
She said it with a laugh.
It was not a joking matter.
"I still can't believe that I thought having one, maybe two meals a day would allow me to become an athlete," she said, referencing her daily battle with an eating disorder.
Eating disorders in all their insidious forms are hideous and damaging diseases.
And swimmers — with the limited covering offered by swimsuits — are particularly prone to falling foul to them, having their insecurities prayed upon.
"Eating disorders come with a lot of shame," Pallister said.
"Because you kinda know that you're doing the wrong thing and it's not a healthy coping mechanism but you kinda get stuck in that sort of pattern.
"I think it's something you'll end up dealing with for the rest of your life.
"By no means do I think I'm perfect and I have an amazing support network to help me with that.
"I think it's such an important thing to be able talk about."
Talking about it is always the hardest first step and Pallister credits Emily Seebohm for allowing her to address it and speak to her mother, 1988 Olympian and 1990 Commonwealth Games champion Janelle Elford.
"Having more experienced athletes in my life that go through something similar and really pave the way to be able to talk about it is the biggest step," Pallister said.
"I'm really proud of how far I've come and being able to advocate for it in this space."
Judging by Elford's reaction in the stands, so is she.
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